Corry Fisted
by akaeve
Summary: Another one of Ducky's tales. Why America drives on the right.
1. Corry Fisted

**Corry Fisted.**

"Do you know why they drive on the left hand side of the road in England?" Dr Mallard questioned Jimmy, after one particularly hazard journey back from the crime scene with their guest, it had happened when Jimmy had seemingly kept swaying to the left.

Jimmy shook his head, he had tried to keep the van on the right side, right side he inwardly smiled, it hadn't been his fault that it had turned out there was a malfunction with the steering.

"It dates back to medieval times, in England. I say England because America didn't really have a medieval time," as Ducky began to mark the body for dissection. "Most people were, and still are, right handed, only 9% of the world's population is left-handed, except for the Yanomami tribe in the Amazon who are 23**% **left handed,"now looking up and staring Jimmy in the face, "It allowed them, not the tribe, to slash at one another when passing on horseback," as Ducky waved the scalpel, he was now holding at Mr Palmer. "Why, you might ask, doesn't this hold true for the rest of Europe and of course America?"

"Agent McGee is left-handed," Jimmy added.

"Quite," as Ducky now sliced the chest in a V to begin the autopsy. "Up until to the late 1700's, everybody travelled on the left side of the road. Why?" as he saw the look on Jimmy's face, "Because it's the sensible option for feudal, violent societies of mostly right-handed people."

"Jousting knights with their lances under their right arm naturally passed on each other's right, and if you passed a stranger on the road you walked on the left to ensure that your protective sword arm was between yourself and him."

"I understand now but did it not go back further?" Jimmy now sheepishly asked.

"Oh yes…the history of the keep-left rule can be tracked back to ancient Greece, Egypt and Rome, and was more widely practised than right-side traffic. The ancient Greeks, Egyptians and Romans adhered to the left side while marching their troops. If two men riding on horseback were to start a fight, each would edge toward the left. Thus, they would be able to draw swords from their right and uphold a defensive position. Eventually, this turned into custom, and later, a law," Ducky continued as he now prised back the skin to expose the chest and ribs.

"It was Revolutionary France, however, who overturned this practice as part of its sweeping social rethink," Ducky continued now looking about for the rib cutters. "A change was carried out all over continental Europe by Napoleon."

"Napoleon?" Jimmy questioned.

"Yes, the reason it changed under Napoleon," Dr Mallard continued, as he stopped cutting and looked again at Jimmy, "Was because he was corry-fisted, his armies had to march on the right so he could keep his sword arm between him and any opponent, of course from then on, any part of the world which was at some time part of the British Empire was thus left hand and any part colonised by the French was right hand."

"Fascinating Dr Mallard, corry-fisted?" as Jimmy watched Ducky lift his left hand and make into a fist, "I hadn't thought of it like that as I never knew Napoleon was one of the 9% left handers or corry-fisted as you so now put it." Jimmy now smiled he understood.

"Now in America it was a different kettle of fish. The French colonised the southern states, Louisiana and the Canadian east coast, Quebec. The Dutch colonised New York or New Amsterdam as they called it. The Spanish and Portuguese colonised the southern Americas. So the British were a minority in shaping the 'traffic' over here so to speak," as Ducky laughed at his own little joke.

"Fascinating," was all Jimmy could say now holding out the dish for Ducky to place the three bullets in.

"To Abby please. But it was in the late 18th century, the shift from the left to the right took place in most countries. In the United States it was based on teamsters, or as you would call them truck drivers. In the past teamsters had large freight wagons pulled by pairs of horses, the wagons had no drivers seats so the driver would sit on the left rear horse, and being right handed held his whip in that hand. And of course sitting on the left he allowed the other wagons to pass on his left thus ensuring he could see the wheels of the oncoming wagons. And so Mr Palmer that is why you ended up driving on the right. That and of course to distance yourselves from the English. It was also of course, to cast off all remaining links with Britain and its past."

"But Dr Mallard, I read somewhere that Japan still drives on the left, I never knew why when the rest of Asia is right," Jimmy asked, as he screwed the lit on the specimen tub.

"Although Japan was never part of the British Empire, its traffic does also keep to the left. This practice goes back all the way to the Edo period, which would be from 1603 to 1867 when the Samurai ruled the country. The sword again, but it wasn't until 1872 that this unwritten rule became official. That was the year when Japan's first railway was introduced."

"What has that got to do with driving on the left," Jimmy now questioned thinking this was getting deep.

"Three countries approached the Japanese government to help them build a railway system. These three countries were America, France, and Britain. In the end, Britain won out. It was in 1872 the first Japanese railway was up and running thanks to the British. If American or French railways had been built instead, Japan would probably be driving on the right side of the road today. Horse railways and electric tram cars followed the left-side driving precedent set by the railways in Japan. Finally in 1924, left-side driving was mandated as official law."

"But the defeat of Japan in 1945 did that not change things?"

"Oh yes after the defeat of Japan during, Okinawa was under control of the United States and made all the Japanese drive on the right. Okinawa only changed back to driving on the left when it was returned to Japan. The change took place on July 30, 1978. It is one of the only places to have changed from right to left hand traffic in the late twentieth century. Now Mr Palmer, to Abby," as Ducky pointed to the jar, "And I will put the kettle on, all that talking has made me thirsty."

Jimmy turned and smiling walked away to Abby's lab.

The End


	2. Boom and Tack

As Ducky looked down at the body, it was missing a leg, and an arm, and half the torso had been blown away.

"My dear boy, what did you do to deserve this? I know you were only serving your country but to die in this manner. Mind you, any war has no happy ending. I just know that it was quick and you didn't suffer," as Ducky now began to examine what was left of poor Corporal John Jones.

"I must say this, and I mean this in no way derogative to your commitment and strength, but when I was a little younger," Ducky now laughed to himself, "I very stupidly sat on explosive….in fact I did it twice," as Dr. Mallard now looked up, and into space, remembering, "Not I may add on the same deployment, and I was young and very foolish in those days."

Ducky sighed to himself as he thought back to the days just after finishing in Edinburgh, he wasn't sure what to do with his degree, but the military seemed a good steady income and job. Dr Mallard began to clean what was left of the body and began to relate his tale.

"I was only 24, and just left Medical School. I joined the Army and entered the RAMC, with the Black Watch, oh yes the Royal Highland Regiment, it was called "The Forty Twa" you know, why? 42nd Royal Highland Regiment of Foot it used to be called, oh yes and "The Regiment," it was also known as "The Black Jocks" or the Ladies from Hell" due to the fact that their uniform was the kilt. It is now called the3rd Battalion, Royal Regiment of Scotland. It was my first real job and well back in those days I was young and eager. You realise that the Vietnam war was beginning to escalate and your then President, Lyndon Johnston begged our Prime Minister of the day, Harold Wilson, to send what he called "a bagpipe band" a way of saying send in the Black Watch."

Ducky moved over to his desk and began to write down some notes, before turning back to Jones.

"The Black Watch was the last British military unit to leave Hong Kong in 1997, I was there, it was a very sad and moving day for the Empire, as mother always put it, but I digress. The British government didn't sign up to fight in Vietnam but much was done "under the radar" as they say. Covert aid from Britain," as Ducky now waved his hands about, "Included flights from England to Hong Kong, thus delivering arms, and especially napalm, along with five-hundred pound bombs."

"Britain did however supply training, in jungle warfare to your special forces, but all the same, British soldiers signed up in hundreds to fight. It was estimated that some 2000 were on the ground at some point. We simply resigned from the army and re-enlisted in the Australian or New Zealand units. Yes I did as I said I was young and foolish. Darwin is such a nice place. Some of our SAS soldiers were given civilian status in US units thus their British Military identity was lost. It was rumoured that United States night bombing raids over Laos, were flown out of a specially built British air base in Thailand, which is interesting as Thailand actually drive on the left side of the road as they do in Blighty. The Thai Government had looked at changing to the right, but as yet they have not. Now where was I, oh yes…..I didn't so much resign I was seconded to one of the Australian regiments and flown out to Hong Kong, and that my friend was the first time, I sat on a bomb."

Dr Mallard now placed the sheet over the body, just leaving the Corporals head showing. Ducky filled his kettle and plugged it in waiting patiently for the water to boil.

"Being in bomb disposal, the EOD, you will be glad to know have the bomb ant it has been examined and identified and will be used in further training, but in this instance corporal, it will not help you."

Ducky poured the boiling water into the teapot and allowing the tea to brew, continued his story.

"The second time I sat on explosives, was when I saw a notice for volunteers to work in Afghanistan, at refugee camps on the Pakistan border. I was back in the RAMC with The Regiment at the time, but felt I could do so much more there, so I asked my Commanding Officer if I could go….it was a very distressing time. I was still young and thought I could change the world. I couldn't but the outcome of my mission changed me forever. It would be years later that my actions, however kind I thought they had been be, came back to haunt," as Ducky now sipped his tea and thought of that fateful day he had been stabbed in the hand by the sister of the man, he had saved, saved in a way from death by the hands of one psychopath of an interrogator.

"Yes, it had been a hard day and I needed to sit and reflect. Had I done the right thing, I thought I had, so I sat on what I thought was a pile of stones, what we call a cairn in Scotland only to be shouted at and this man came running towards me and pulled me onto my feet. I don't know what he was shouting but I got the gist, I had been sitting on a unexploded bomb and the stones were covering it. They had been waiting for the EOD, someone very much like yourself Corporal to defuse. I was lucky or I could have ended up as you are."

As Ducky drained his cup he stood and walked back to the body, "It was after that terrible work I decided to move into autopsy and become a medical examiner. But I remember it was Bosnia 1993…" Dr Mallard began to smile as he now covered the head of Corporal Jones, and prepared him for the drawer for the night.

The End


End file.
